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Review: Green Lantern: Emerald Warriors #12

Posted By: Wonder Worlock
Wed, 07/27/2011 - 22:38

You remember that hairy spider you saw on practically every late night talk show when you were growing up? The one that would gross out the actress on the couch and crawl up the host’s arm as he feigned fright?

Well, it has been in a prison of sorts for years – GLC Precinct House in Sector 3595, to be precise --  but in Green Lantern: Emerald Warriors #12, the boogie monster breaks free (ironically, thanks to the late Lantern Mogo) and menaces our universe anew.

It seems this beast has tasted green lantern energy and now craves it like a pregnant lady in Month 10! So what do the all-knowing Guardians do? Well, they assemble a group of Lanterns (using green power rings as weapons, natch) and send them after the hungry creature.

Now pardon me, but isn’t that like combating King Kong by throwing bananas at him?

“Bananas” are not used for weapons here, but the term does describe this outing of fan fave Lantern Guy Gardner. While the voices of the Lanterns are intact under writer Peter J. Tomasi (who even has a Lantern named for him), this one-issue story does little or nothing except see Corps members (50 of them!) die needlessly in a tale better sent to Cartoon Network.

No flaws in the beautiful art by Chris Batista and John Dell. They endeavor to make this cosmic tarantula scary and threatening. But I keep having flashbacks of the 1990 TV movie based on Stephen King’s great novel It.

A spider? Really? REALLY?!

Come on, guys, I know the relaunch is just around the corner, but you can do better than this. And have.